Letting Go of Pieces to Self-Transform

If you ever become a half of yourself, and I hope you do for your own sake, my boy, you will understand things beyond the common intelligence of brains that are whole.”

Italo Calvino's "The Cloven Viscount" unravels the life of Viscount Medardo of Terralba who, struck by a cannonball, undergoes a unique transformation into two distinct halves—Navigating this duality, he acquires newfound wisdom, gaining a deeper understanding of both the world and self. Calvino articulates this introspection through his main character's reflective musings:

“If only I could have every whole thing like this,” said my uncle, lying facedown on the rocks, stroking the convulsive half of an octopus, “so that everyone could escape from his obtuse and ignorant wholeness. I was whole and all things were natural and confused to me, stupid as the air; I thought I was seeing all and it was only the outside rind. If you ever become a half of yourself, and I hope you do for your own sake, my boy, you will understand things beyond the common intelligence of brains that are whole. You will have lost half of yourself and of the world, but the remaining half will be a thousand times deeper and more precious. And you too would find yourself wanting everything to be like yourself, because beauty and knowledge and justice only exists in what has been cut to shreds.”

For leaders, this captivating tale offers inspiration to navigate their unique developmental paths. According to leadership development expert Jennifer Garvey Berger, the theory of Adult Development explores where individuals are coming from, where they’re at, and where they’re going. By attaining a self-transforming form of mind, leaders can adeptly draw upon diverse perspectives, creating interconnections that foster continuous growth, learning, and change. As Berger explains, this mindset becomes a "natural playground of complexity," providing a seamless space to grapple with opposing forces and hold polarities with ease.

And why is self-transformation so crucial? As a global CEO survey conducted by Egon Zehnder reveals, there is near-unanimous agreement among a thousand top leaders that they need the capacity to transform themselves to transform their organization. 
The takeaway is clear: You can’t develop yourself and evolve unless you leave behind some pieces of yourself, as Calvino’s narrative underscores. The perceived darkness of letting go of pieces actually creates and enables the light. What you used to know about yourself, both personally and professionally, feels distant now. As you realize your limitations, your old self opens up to a new version with more relevant qualities. You create more space for reinvention.

But here's a caution: pushing yourself or others to change when it's not the right time can backfire. Timing matters for successful evolution as forcing it prematurely may hinder the desired outcomes.

Here are a few questions to embark on your self-transformation journey:

• How ready are you to let go of pieces of yourself to let you develop even beyond your current beliefs and self-transform? 
• How can coaching help you develop and see beyond your own horizon?
• How easy or hard is it for you to let go of your narrative? Of your current truth?
• What do you feel is your relationship with ‘being in control’? 
• What are you ready to let go of? 

Do these questions resonate with you? Which ones strike a major chord? Is there a book you’d like to see discussed in this series? Connect with me on LinkedIn to share.