The Work of Becoming a Leader:
A Conversation

In our work with senior leaders, we are often invited into moments of transition rather than moments of arrival. They are facing weightier mandates, intensified pressures, and heightened anxiety in deeply unpredictable conditions, all while remaining an anchoring presence for their organizations and communities. 

These conditions call for more than competence. They demand an expansion of leadership capacity. This means operating beyond the edges of what leaders may already know or have been formally trained to do, and developing the inner capability to navigate ambiguity, vulnerability, and sustained pressure. 

To explore what this kind of growth looks like in practice, we recently sat down for a conversation focused on personal development, leading in discomfort, self-awareness, and the importance of grounding oneself while taking on greater responsibility. What follows are a set of reflections from that dialogue, shaped by the work we do with leaders and that hopefully can offer inspiration for those on a similar path. 

Leaders have grown accustomed to operating in environments of constant change. What varies is their level of comfort with discomfort that change creates. Many of the leaders we work with carry increasing responsibility in uncertain conditions, and not all have had the opportunity to build this capability. Yet it has become essential for organizations seeking to endure and evolve. 

While the instinct is often to manage or minimize discomfort, we see greater impact when leaders build tolerance for it. This does not remove tension or ambiguity. It strengthens leaders’ ability to think clearly under pressure and create environments where learning and adaptation are possible. That steadiness gradually shapes culture in ways that are subtle yet meaningful. 

The ability to navigate discomfort is closely linked to leadership development. As leaders grow, development increasingly becomes a process of discernment, understanding what to let go of alongside what to continue strengthening. Many leaders reach senior roles because particular traits and skills have served them exceptionally well, helping them overcome early challenges and establish credibility. As contexts change, those same qualities can begin to narrow leadership impact, limiting connection, creativity, or influence. 

This is where unlearning becomes essential. Think about leadership as a container that holds experiences, skills, and traits accumulated across a career. Some still serve leaders well, while others no longer fit the context they now lead in. Letting go requires honest reflection. Leaders who engage with this process thoughtfully create space for new skills and perspectives to emerge, expanding their capacity to navigate change and lead with greater range and impact. 

Many leadership behaviors are shaped by internal narratives that operate quietly below the surface. Stories about who leaders believe they are, what they value, or how they think they must perform often guide decisions without conscious awareness. In our advisory work, we see that progress often begins when leaders learn how to take a view from the balcony, noticing these narratives rather than acting on them automatically. 

This perspective allows leaders to step back from the immediacy of action and reflect on what is unfolding. Patterns become visible, both within the systems they lead and within themselves. When reflection is grounded in curiosity rather than judgment, it supports insight without undermining confidence. Leaders who cultivate this capacity tend to act with greater intention and maintain steadiness under pressure. 

As leadership responsibility grows, grounding becomes increasingly important. Many leaders describe the subtle pull toward role and performance, particularly during periods of sustained pressure. The demands of the role can gradually dominate how leaders see themselves. Those who remain effective tend to preserve connections that anchor them beyond their professional identity, drawing on relationships that offer perspective and continuity. 

Grounding rarely takes the form of grand gestures. It often shows up in simple, consistent practices that reconnect leaders to who they are outside their role. These moments support resilience, help leaders maintain balance under pressure, and reinforce that leadership draws strength from a broader sense of identity. 

We offer these reflections as an invitation to pause. What remains available to leaders is choice in how they listen, learn, and relate to themselves as their roles continue to expand. Leadership unfolds through reflection, curiosity, and continued growth. In that ongoing process of becoming, leaders create the conditions for others to grow alongside them.

This conversation was recorded during the 13th People Make the Brand Conference, hosted by Harvard Business Review Turkey. We are grateful to the organizers for creating the space for this exchange.